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The art of the DM is a powerful skill to master because it can land you jobs, even if you have no network. Here’s our Gen Z guide on exactly how to cold message recruiters, managers and even CEOs—with DM templates and real advice that actually gets replies.
How to Cold Message a Recruiter (and actually get a reply)
Recruiters get flooded with messages—some thoughtful, some… not so much. If you’re cold messaging someone, especially on LinkedIn, you’ve got maybe 5 seconds to make an impression before they scroll past or hit delete. That means your message needs to stand out—but not in a “sent-from-a-resume-template” way. You want to sound human, clear, and intentional. Not cringe. Not overly formal. Not begging. Just confident and curious. The good news? When done right, a cold message can cut through the noise—and open doors most people never even knock on.
So before you hit send, make sure you get your stuff together first!
Before You Slide In: Prep Your Assets 🧰
Before crafting your message, set yourself up for success with assets that prove you’re serious. Cold messaging without prep is like applying to a job with no resume—yikes.
Start with a Google Drive folder that houses your:
- Resume: Make it clean, ATS-friendly, and shareable.
- Portfolio: Especially for marketing, design, or writing.
- LinkedIn profile: Treat this like your digital handshake. It should have a profile photo, strong headline ("Marketing Intern passionate about Gen Z trends" > "Student at UCLA"), and a clear About section.
Do Your Homework: Research > Random Reachouts📌
Then, research the person you’re reaching out to AND the company. Know their mission, recent campaigns, and culture. Why do you align with them? Mentioning that in your DM/email boosts your chance of a reply by showing you're not just spamming.
"I looked at the founder’s background, the company’s funding stage, team size, and recent press or LinkedIn activity. I was specifically looking for signs of momentum—like recent funding, new hires, or global expansion—to understand if they might benefit from an intern or junior hire." — Mansi Gupta, Senior Partnerships Associate
"You need to analyze your situation considering the role and the company size." — Begum Kuralkan, Corporate Development Intern
Write the DM That Actually Gets a Reply 💬
Your message should be short, personal, and respectful. Think: the texting equivalent of making eye contact at a career fair. It’s your first impression—and you want it to land.
Here’s a winning formula:
- Subject line / opener: “Inspired by your recent talk at NYU” or “Loved your post on early-career design roles”.
- Who you are: Keep it one line. E.g. “I’m a junior at FAMU exploring careers in climate policy.”
- Why them: Be specific. What about their work/company caught your eye?
- The ask: Keep it light. "Could I ask 2 quick questions?" or "I'd love to hear how you broke into [field]."
Why This Works (And What Recruiters Told Us)
Because it makes things easy for the person you're messaging. They're busy. But if they can understand what you want in under 10 seconds—and they see you've made an effort—your odds of a reply skyrocket.
"What worked for me was asking for guidance rather than a job. Even if the person can’t offer a role, a sincere request for advice can compel them to respond." — Mansi Gupta, Senior Partnerships Associate
"In your message, you should put that asset on the table to create curiosity." — Begum Kuralkan, Corporate Development Intern
Here’s a breakdown of what each section really means:
- The Opener shows you've done your homework. Referencing something recent or specific is way more impactful than “Hope you’re doing well.”
- Your Intro positions you in a sentence. Not your resume—just the headline.
- Why Them is the credibility booster. You’re not cold-messaging 50 people with the same copy-paste note. You picked them.
- The Ask should sound low-effort and high-value. Something they can say yes to in under 5 seconds.
You’re not selling a pitch deck. You're starting a conversation.
The best messages:
- Feel human
- Don’t ramble
- Make it easy to say yes
📌Pro Tip: Use line breaks. People read on their phones. If your message looks like a wall of text, you’ve already lost.
And no, you don't need to be overly formal. But do spell-check. Be chill, not sloppy. Think clear and confident, not robotic or desperate.
Remember, it’s less about sounding impressive and more about being intentional.
The Unwritten Rules: Do’s and Don’ts of Cold Messaging ⚖️
Let's keep it real—but kind. These "don’ts" aren’t meant to call anyone out; they’re here to help you make your message land better. Think of them as gentle guardrails, not a roast session.
"Be real. Don’t overthink tone—write how you speak. Be curious, not transactional. Ask for advice, not a job. Keep it short and skimmable. Personalize one sentence so they know it’s not copy-paste." — Mansi Gupta, Senior Partnerships Associate
"Don't send something too generic. If you have a chance to make it a bit personal—maybe tell a short story or mention a class that sparked your interest—it creates curiosity." — Begum Kuralkan, Corporate Development Intern
Pro tip: Emojis can be OK in DMs (sparingly). In emails, maybe not. Keep it human, but still professional enough for career vibes.These aren’t just etiquette tips; they’re proven behaviors that Gen Z students (and recruiters) have told us actually make a difference.
DO
- Personalize. Say why you're reaching out to this person. Generic = ignored.
- Follow up once (after 3–5 days). Keep it gentle and non-pushy.
- Keep it short.
- Mention something specific from their LinkedIn, blog, or portfolio—it shows you're not mass-sending.
- End with gratitude. A simple "Thanks either way" adds warmth without pressure.
DON'T
- Use "To whom it may concern" (it’s giving bot). You can do better—and it only takes 5 seconds..
- Jump straight into a job ask. Building a relationship first often leads to better opportunities.
- Write an essay. You’ve got plenty of stories—save them for the interview.
- Send the same exact message to everyone.Trust us, they’ll know. Personal tweaks go a long way.
- Overdo the follow-ups. One polite nudge is great; after that, it’s okay to move on and try someone new. If they don’t reply, it’s not a personal attack.
📌Pro tip: Emojis can be OK in DMs (sparingly). In emails, maybe not.
Cold DM Templates to Steal (No, Really) ✍️
Sometimes, all you need is a head start. And no, using a template doesn’t make your message inauthentic—as long as you personalize it. Think of these as your blank canvas: fill in the blanks with real details about you and the person you're reaching out to. That’s how you go from generic to genuine.
These templates are designed to be short, confident, and friendly—just like the best cold messages we’ve seen from successful Externs.
You can tweak them to suit your style, whether you’re reaching out for advice, trying to highlight an application, or simply starting a convo. Don’t feel pressure to be too formal either; your tone should match your voice, just slightly more polished.
DM Template (LinkedIn or Twitter/X)
Hey [Name]! I’m [your name], a student at [school]. I’ve been following your work on [topic] and loved your post about [specific thing]. Would love to ask a couple of questions if you’re open to it. Totally understand if you're busy. Appreciate all you share!
📌 Why this works: It’s friendly, fast to read, and shows appreciation while gently asking for time. Just swap in a real post or shared interest for that personal touch.
Email Template
Subject: Quick note on my application for [role name]
Hi [Name],
My name is [Your Name] and I recently applied to the [position name] through [job board/platform]. I’m reaching out directly because I strongly believe I’d be a great fit for this role. Based on my background in [relevant past experience or role], I’m confident I could bring value to your team.
I know you’re busy, but I just wanted to highlight my application and express my enthusiasm for the opportunity to contribute.
Kind regards,
[Your Name]
[LinkedIn URL or portfolio link]
📌 Tip: If you haven’t applied yet, just swap in a softer ask—something like “I’m very interested in [company name] and was curious if your team is considering interns for [summer/fall/etc.].”
"I really believed my past experiences could be a great asset for the role. Either your experience or interests should be aligned with the role." — Begum Kuralkan, Corporate Development Intern
"It shows that you are resourceful and thoughtful." — Begum Kuralkan, Corporate Development Intern
"The tone was humble, but strategic—aiming to build rapport first, not just ask for a job." — Mansi Gupta, Senior Partnerships Associate
And don’t forget: these are just starting points. You’re not locked into the script. Add your personality, your curiosity, your story. That’s the difference between a message that gets ignored—and one that gets answered.
How to Follow Up Without Being “That” Person 🔁
People are busy. Sometimes they mean to reply and forget. A nudge can go a long way if it’s done right. The key is to keep it casual, kind, and zero-pressure. You're not being annoying—you're being intentional.
Following up doesn’t make you desperate. It makes you proactive. Just keep it spaced out (4–5 days is ideal), respectful, and friendly. The tone should be more “gentle reminder” than “why haven’t you answered me?”
Follow-Up DM (after 4–5 days)
Just wanted to bump this in case it got buried! Still super curious about your insights on [topic]. Thanks again either way 😊
Follow-Up Email
Subject: Just checking in
Hi [Name],
I know you’re probably swamped, but I wanted to follow up in case my message got missed. I’m still really interested in learning more about your work at [Company], and I’d really appreciate a chance to connect.
Thanks again!
[Your Name]
📌 Tip: Keep the follow-up shorter than your original message. If your first note had all the context, you don’t need to reintroduce yourself—just nudge.
"Typically, I’d follow up within 2 days, engage with their content, build momentum, and make sure you're visible." — Mansi Gupta, Senior Partnerships Associate
"A message can be lost in an inbox. I believe it is ok to follow up with another message. But I wouldn't send another reminder after that, in order not to bother more." — Begum Kuralkan, Corporate Development Intern
Also, engagement matters. Commenting on their posts, liking their content, or even tagging them in thoughtful shares is a subtle way to stay on their radar. You don’t always have to follow up with a message—visibility can work too.
📌 Bottom line: One follow-up is smart. Two is the max. Beyond that? It’s not a no—it’s just not now.
Never follow up more than twice. If they ghost you, it’s okay. The next person might reply—and they might be even more aligned with what you're looking for.
Cold DMs That Actually Worked - According to Recruiters and CEOs 🗣️
What actually makes someone stop scrolling, open your message, and hit reply? We went straight to the source: hiring managers, CEOs, and recruiters who receive cold DMs and emails all the time. Their answers? Surprisingly down-to-earth.
They’re not expecting perfection. But they are hoping you’ve done your homework and show up with some clarity and curiosity.
“I ignore messages that feel like spam. If someone has clearly done their research, I’ll always try to reply.” — Jessica Lin, Head of Talent, Wellpath HealthTech
“If you're kind, brief, and specific, you’re already ahead of 90% of people.” — Andre Romero, CEO, VantaIQ (B2B SaaS)
“Please stop asking to pick my brain. Offer context instead. Ask one thoughtful question—that's more likely to get a reply.” — Sara Min, Product Manager, Snap Inc.
These quotes echo what students like you have already told us:
“Definitely a little nervous—but also hopeful. I knew I had relevant experience and was curious about working in smaller teams. It felt like a low-risk, high-reward move.” — Mansi Gupta, Senior Partnerships Associate
“You need to look into yourself and find a valuable asset that might contribute to the role.” — Begum Kuralkan, Corporate Development Intern
Whether you're messaging someone in a startup, a Fortune 500, or a nonprofit, the formula is the same: be thoughtful, be brief, and be real. If you do that, you're already ahead of most people in their inbox.
Quick Recap: Cold Message Like a Pro 💡
Feeling overwhelmed? Here’s your speed-round version of everything we covered:
- ✅ Prep first. Your resume, LinkedIn, and research matter. You can’t reach out with nothing to back it up.
- 💬 Make it personal. Cold messages shouldn’t feel cold. Reference something specific, keep it short, and be real.
- 🚫 Avoid red flags. Don’t ask for a job straight out. Don’t send essays. Don’t be robotic.
- 📥 Follow up once, max twice. Keep it friendly and low-pressure. If they ghost, it’s not the end of the world.
- 🧠 Remember what works. Guidance > asks. Curiosity > desperation. Being human > being “perfect.”
Cold messaging isn’t just about “shooting your shot.” It’s about opening a door.
Want more help making those doors easier to open? Check out our full Networking Guide for Students for more strategies, scripts, and tools to grow your career—without needing connections.
You've got this—and you’ve got Extern to back you up., but remember: everyone starts somewhere. That CEO you admire? They probably cold emailed someone once too. Be kind, be curious, and be consistent.
And hey—you already did the hardest part: getting started.
